I learned about sincerity and experienced true freedom in one of the most challenging and powerful experiences of my life.

It’s been almost two years since I went to the sacred mountain for my third year of Vision Quest — nine days and nine nights in solitude, fasting, and prayer 👇🏼

Here is a bit of my experience - Listen to the full sharing through the podcast episode above.

“Without any judgment, I was able to revisit memories ingrained within, of being taught by punishment, feeling bad, less than, not worthy. I saw where I created ideas of worth by doing, accomplishing, attention only by achieving, by being good rather than by inherent goodness.

I associated love by merit and this created such deep insecurity in me that it led me to move through life with a sense of unworthiness and overachieving with self-sacrifice and not finding a deep meaning to it all.”

There’s no way to fully describe it — the depth of what happens when Spirit takes over your entire being and begins to move everything within you with love and precision.

I’ll share what I can — the parts that continue to shape how I live, pray, and walk in the world today.

LEARNING COHERENCE

The first days were intense. My body was uncomfortable. I was on my moon, fasting, and my mind was scattered — probably more than it had ever been in previous years of VQ. I was trying to pray, but even my prayers felt messy.

Then, Spirit spoke. Not through words, but through deep understanding.
It showed me how I had been living in incoherence — praying for one thing while feeding another.

• I prayed for a beautiful experience at Vision Quest, but I hadn’t stopped complaining.
• I prayed for self-love, but I judged myself.
• I prayed for balance, but I kept working past my limits and putting everything before what truly matters: my family, my health, my connection with God.

In that moment, I heard clearly in my heart:

“You take the first step, and I will do the rest; But you must take that first step. You must be coherent with what you are truly wanting from your heart. ”

Once I understood that, everything shifted. I began noticing blessings everywhere — and the more I looked for them, the more they appeared.

THE HUMILITY TO PRAY

Fasting strips away everything unnecessary. It brings you face to face with life’s raw essence — and I understood that nourishment, warmth, community, care, support, None of it is guaranteed.

The humility to recognize this dependence brings you back down to earth. Then a clear and deep understanding came over me. If you don't make prayer your priority, then your life is going to be very hard.

Prayer is the force that connects you with your heart. It connects you with God. It aligns everything for well-being.

That was the lesson of humility. Always have the humility to pray. 
 

Prayer is not just an act of asking. It’s also an act of remembering.

THE MEDICINE OF AWARENESS

By the fifth day, I received the support of a few fruits and sacred plant medicine. 

The medicine revealed childhood memories buried deep in my subconscious. I saw how those early experiences created patterns of overachievement, self-sacrifice, and the constant feeling of not being enough. Listen to the podcast episode for more details on this experience.

And yet, instead of judgment, I felt love.

Awareness itself was the healing.
I realized: I am an adult now. I don’t need to carry this anymore.

That experience gave me the whole gift, like the night that brings a day, like the thirst that allows you to value water, like the sweet surrender of coming back home to myself once again.

I am free, and I have valuable lessons learned, gathered from experience lived to the bone; Experience which gives me the freedom to move forward with humility and gratitude. 

That afternoon, I sat on the earth and cried tears of pure joy. It was as if a veil had lifted from my eyes. Every color was brighter. Every sound was alive. Every breath was sacred.

I remembered — life is a gift.
Every single part of it.

Even the difficult ones.
Even the moments that break us open.

Because everything — truly everything — is working to bring us back home to love.

A SEED TO CARRY

Everything we live is sacred — just like Vision Quest, where every detail, every challenge, every celebration holds a purpose.

It’s easy to see Spirit in sacred spaces like Vision Quest, but the truth is — life itself is a ceremony. Every moment holds a lesson. Every challenge carries a blessing.

When we relate to life with that awareness — with humility and love — we begin to see that what once felt like pain or lack was actually Spirit’s way of giving us diamonds for our soul.

This is the true gift of Vision Quest:
The remembrance that everything — everything — is sacred.